Joseph looked out of the window, watching people passing by while the ice-cream man watched Joseph out the corner of his eye Joe said “sally would you come with me if I had to leave this place ‘cause those Latin boys don’t know my name but they sure as hell know my face” she said “I’ll never ask you what you did and I never saw no proof” he said “well even if you asked me that I could never tell the truth and Carlo’s not the kind of man who likes to compromise and I can’t go to the cops ‘cause I just can’t go back inside” and she says “everything will be alright and everything will work out fine we could run away anywhere that you want to and everything will be alright and everything will work out fine but you know that all of this will still come back to haunt you” Carlo’s boys are watching out for Joseph day and night armed to the teeth and always pissed and spoiling for a fight and for some of them the consequences are fresh in their minds while the rest of them don’t think and don’t know where to draw the line and in a seedy bar the ice-cream man is ordering a gin while the prostitutes and deviants and sailors shuffle in and a woman talks to Carlo, her face covered in a shroud she says “it’s safe to talk here but just don’t say my name out loud” and, up on the rooftops, all the undercover cops Joseph wakes up in the night and senses movement “I think they’re gonna hear me now and, jump down the chimney now” he’s looking still and as a mannequin and twice as useless Sally she comes home and find Joe sitting on the floor the place has been turned over, every cupboard every draw Joe says “they didn’t find a thing, I swear it on my life they found my sheath and holster but even I can’t find my knife “so that’s the final warning now the writing’s on the wall but it’s written in Portuguese so I don’t understand it all but it’s time to face the music, I know he’d love to hear me plead but I would rather fall down backwards than forward onto my knees but “everything will be alright and everything will work out fine it’s just the way it went, you know it’s not the way I planned it everything will be alright and everything will work out fine I didn’t mean to kill her I just did it out of habit” so in the street at dawn, Joseph steps out brave and bold while the ice cream man clandestinely watched everything unfold and Carlo cocks his pistol, just about to take Joe’s life when Sally steps out and guts him with Joseph’s missing knife and as the cops swung round the corner she thrust the knife into Joe’s hand and while he just stood there stunned she jumped into the ice cream van now Joseph’s serving gaol time, this time they made him pay while Sally’s serving ice cream in a city far away she writes him a letter now, sayin’ “no one else can hurt us now you know I had to do it even if you don’t know why” and Joe reads every word out loud and writes down his answer now even though she never gave him an address to reply he said “everything will be alright and everything will work out fine I’m making up a jigsaw from the pieces of the past everything will be alright and everything will work out fine but I miss your elfin smile and your graceless laugh” everything will be alright and everything will work out fine no one ever seems to make the most of second chances everything will be alright and everything will work out fine and no one ever thought maybe the evidence was planted

Last night I lay beside a girl with matted hair in a little shanty down by a river where the ducks with their ducklings would float along and the eels with their elver did slither and the wind blew through the windows and the both of us did shiver all through the night did we shiver I wanted to go home, so I asked her the way she said “you can’t go out there alone in that howling sideways rain” so I lay back on the floor and I knew I had to stay yes all through the night would I stay I couldn’t feel my arm, so I told her I was hungry and sick she laughed and rolled a cigarette and said “did you think I’d fall for that trick?” so I turned my head away and the air was smoky and thick all in my lungs was it thick she pulled out of a draw into the mattress on the floor something that she kept hid from my view I couldn’t see her eyes in the flickering light so I didn’t know just what she might do she put a finger on my chest and somehow then I knew yes all through the night, I knew and as the sun pushed through the treetops at the top of the hill the cockatoos were silent now, the green bush was deathly still she said “will you walk with me?” I said “I have to so I will all through the green bush I will” so we hopped across the stepping stones, and trudged on through the mud the ducklings were gone, the eels were fat and feathers painted the water with blood she held was something in her hand but she quickly covered it up yeah all from my eyes she covered it up then somewhere in the green bush a possum screamed as the clouds were taking form there was a drop of rain and thunder played the anacrusis of a storm and the girl she was gone and my throat felt strangely warm yes my throat was strangely wet and warm in that split second of time I was crippled I was blind blood spattered down the front of my shirt and at the back of my head I a voice as she said get up boy you ain’t even hurt and the green faded to black as I lay in the dirt all through the night I lay in the dirt now back home with my doctor, her hair grey at the roots she said “where have you been my boy, out on one more of your unnatural pursuits? Tell me where have you really been?” and I pointed at the mud on my boots yeah I said “just look at the mud on my boots”

I can smell a faint echo of a memory, in the petrichor and the smoke and after all I realise, that this has all been a joke and it’s not only you, you see you’re just like me not even a man just a road to be walked upon nothing else matters to her because we’re all just flowers in the garden of Sarah no nothing else matters to her just because you’re just another petal in the garden of Sarah when first she came to me, I thought I would die, if she even turned and looked my way I’d live in her pocket, just coil round her tongue so I could hang on every word that she might say ah she’s too good for me, I’d tell all my friends she’s so gorgeous that she makes me shallow again I should have realised just how I would end up as just another petal in the garden of Sarah and you’re just like me, you don’t have a soul no hopes, no dreams, no feelings at all you’ll never be anything close to her ‘cause you’re just another petal in the garden of Sarah then I realised that I was not the only one penned inside these walls of old convict brick but we all held our tongues, no you wouldn’t dare complain, or she’d spit and swear and snap you like a stick like the lilies in the day jasmine in the dark she’d pot me and prune me and peel back my bark she doesn’t care about leaving her mark ‘cause everything is rosy in the garden of Sarah and you’re just like me, you don’t have a soul no hopes, no dreams, no feelings at all you’ll never be anything close to her ‘cause you’re just another petal in the garden of Sarah now I crawl in the leaves, I writhe in the dirt, in the hope that she might notice me again and I know I should leave, probably could if I would, probably would if I only had a brain now all she can see as she’s looking down is some far forgotten forlorn fuckup floating around your leaves have all withered and your roots can’t be found when you’re just another petal in the garden of Sarah and you’re just like me, you don’t have a soul no hopes, no dreams, no feelings at all you’ll never be anything close to her ‘cause you’re just another petal in the garden of Sarah now the flowers have wilted, the bees have all gone in this unspeakable unstoppable decline the trees have been hewn, the fields have been sundered, torn up by the tractors of my mind now I feel like, though it’s awful to say some slippery sleazy slimy slug just sliding away but I can’t help but think that I’ll be back again some day to be just another petal in the garden of Sarah and you’re just like me, you don’t have a soul no hopes, no dreams, no feelings at all you’ll never be anything close to her ‘cause you’re just another petal in the garden of Sarah you’re just another petal in the garden of Sarah

life was a circle, always looking to borrow money from next week and happiness from tomorrow looking back down the road as the light gets dimmer at the roadkill of my life in the rear-view mirror always shifting the burden onto somebody else ‘cause I seem to be incapable of caring for myself heading for the open door, too numb for regret like a beloved family pet on his final trip to the vet then things got bad and things got weird but false courage overcame irrational fear that’s the theory of the moths, the winding back of the clocks she made me feel like I could be everything that I’m not Ally I’ll take you home with me you’re my worst friend and my best enemy oh Ally without you I can’t sleep oh Ally I drain you and you drain me asleep with my boots on, no kind of defence Ally knows all ‘cause she’s seen all seven sides of the fence now I’m just waiting at the door like a shepherd to the slaughter lead the horse down to the lake and shove its head under the water cards on the table, clothes on the floor I always knew that she would have me coming back for more and there was that something, I’d been looking to find should have seen the warning signs, but I was far too blind then she took all my money, she took my pride as well ‘cause you don’t meet nice girls in these kinda hotels I let her lead me so far off the track it’s been too long now and I don’t know how to find my way back Ally I’ll take you home with me you’re my worst friend and my best enemy oh Ally without you I can’t sleep oh Ally I drain you and you drain me she hit me for six with no kind of warning and after that night I couldn’t get up in the morning makeshift bandages, mysterious bruises we’re playing the game that only dignity loses I run back and forth between your house and my bed with my broken heart or my broken head my mistress, my gaoler, my success and my failure I think we broke the world again and it was always down to you when I couldn’t even stand when my face hit the deck or the shit hit the fan my friends are gone my clothes are torn it’s all quickly heading south who knew something so sweet could leave such a bad taste in my mouth? Ally I’ll take you home with me you’re my worst friend and my best enemy oh Ally without you I can’t sleep oh Ally I drain you and you drain me Ally I can’t just leave you on the shelf oh Ally you know I’ve got nobody else oh Ally I know you’re so bad for my health but I need you Ally, ‘cause I can’t stand myself I need you Ally, because I can’t stand myself

He says “I think I’ll go to sleep, ‘cause I’m far too tired to eat Do you think that’s wise? Do you think that’s wise? And I don’t wanna talk tonight, I just filled myself with wine Is that alright? Is that alright?” So she takes herself outside, so he doesn’t see her cry And blows smoke into the cheerless winter sky She watches possums fight, hears them screaming in the night Do they understand? They understand “Can anyone else see, surely this can’t just be me? Is it that bad? Is it that bad? He never left a mark, just a skidmark on my heart Where there once used to be a man My clothes will never dry this rain keeps pouring from the sky Look at it fall, look at it fall But you shouldn’t complain, ‘cause the farmers need the rain But don’t we all? Don’t we all? So I’ll stay outside the door, ‘cause you never can be sure What’s on the other side of the wall” Such a loss of direction as she sees her reflection In the knife, in the knife “I can’t even see myself, surely this is someone else Is this my life? Is this my life? Is this how it’s meant to be, is this all there is for me Is this my lot, just to be some drunkard’s wife? “now I think I need to go, ‘cause this don’t feel like it’s my home But am I sure? I think I’m sure I’ve dealt with all of this distress like Job in a dress There must be more, to life, there must be more” She cut him one last break, one more chance he didn’t take He opened the fridge, she opened the door Now that she’s gone back to Sydney He mutters to his whisky “No this just couldn’t, it just couldn’t be my fault I would have been her dog or her master her blessing her disaster I would have been anything at all but tell her not to come home scrub flesh from my bones don’t look at me don’t listen don’t talk I could've been someone else I could look after my self but just don’t paint me as something that I’m not”

When the fox cried one it dragged me from a dream of exorcisms in a cold green beam I was soaked in sweat, my eyes were blind I was wracked with guilt as to what I might find And the cops were peering in my windows And the currawong was perched on the line With his beady yellow eye mocking me Sayin’ “you’ll never make it in time” and the lines appear and it’s just begun there’s no going back when the fox cries one in a fit of nostalgia when the fox cried two the currawong flitted past a piss-stained moon I could smell your breath I could taste your tears it’s all so real ‘til it all disappears and the dragon’s teeth are melting and the currawong cackles again and the queen peels back her mask as all the king’s horses trample all the king’s men it’s the end of the beginning when the blade cuts through we’re on the edge of abyss when the fox cries two I woke again when the fox cried three to my baby muttering a desperate plea I can’t keep him fed, I can’t stitch the thread he’ll never stop ‘til he sees her dead and there’s no way out of this circus this much water don’t just go down the drain and the currawong casts his obdurate eye over the next victim in his game and I fell to the ground behind the spinning machine ‘cause I can’t stand up when the fox cries three now the currawong crouched on the crest of the cradle, crimson dripping from its crooked claw and the pieces of you soak into to the carpet ‘cause that’s all that’s left when the fox cries four

she gets up every morning and goes to work at half past eight she says goodbye while he’s still sleeping she slams the door but he doesn’t wake she has a hard day at the office gets the bus home all alone she wonders what he’s done with his day he’s still in bed when she gets home and she says you’re such a dickhead but I love you I don’t know why I even care all you ever do is waste my time but I know I still want you there he gets up after midday has a coffee and a smoke doesn’t bother with an ashtray ‘cause he’s just not that kind of bloke then he stares at the walls for hours and wonders why he even got up she gets home in a bad mood he hasn’t even done the washing up and she says you’re such a dickhead but I love you I don’t know why I even care all you ever do is waste my time but I know I still want you there she goes to bed super early ‘cause she’s got work the next few days she looks forward to the weekend to try his shoes on for a change she knows that she should probably leave him she can think of more than 50 ways while he goes out to the pub again to spend what’s left of her change and she says you’re such a dickhead but I love you I don’t know why I even try I know I should probably throw you out but please don’t ever say goodbye she sees the clock ticking backwards while he sees the beauty of the world a melody carried on a soft wind all the colours of the landscape all unfurled he says “can’t you see that you’re miserable wasting away in the nine to five you’re missing all the good things in life so who exactly is wasting their time?” and he says you’re such a dickhead but I love you it’s not as bad as it seems you don’t always have to be so busy why not waste a little time with me? and she says you’re such a dickhead but I love you I don’t know why I even care all you ever do is waste my time but I know I still want you there

I never sleep when I’m sober, never dream when I’m drunk I get bit by the dog when I dance and you know it’s your lot and you know what you’ve got no skill at a game of chance with a couple of friends and a handful of drunks round a fire on a rainy night then you’re gone with the tide and it’s a bargain for suicide it comes with a lifetime supply it’ll be plain to see When she comes rolling back to me when the bottles are empty and so is your head and you’ve tripped over yesterday’s thoughts and you wake up at dawn when the lights all come on and you’re wondering just what you’ve caught see it’s ribbed for her pleasure, sealed for your protection but it doesn’t seem worth it now there’s a storm in my stomach and a sudden regret and high that comes crashing down that’s just how I’ll be when she comes rolling back to me you can’t always carry someone on your shoulders ‘cause you know that we all have our issues but she just keeps going and my bin’s overflowing past the brim with her tear-soaked tissues now I’ve lost my patience, she’s lost in translation and some kind of obfuscation and I drag her away from the cars on the highway ‘cause somehow that’s my obligation but I’ll get free when she comes rolling back to me she’s got eyes like the sky on clear sunny day and a smile that could rupture your soul and she carries her money around in a book ‘cause her wallet was riddled with holes and I wait for the morning when I can roll over and see that she still hasn’t left ‘cause you know what I mean, must everyone’s dream to wake up with the girl you love best and that’s how we’ll be when she comes rolling back to me now the whole room is spinning so I focus my eyes on mysterious stains on the ceiling and I held her close, all drunk and morose with a cracked whisper of a feeling and I thought I must have broke all of her fingers as the poison leached out of my system and she held her nerve though I didn’t deserve the ten-millionth chance I’d been given but I promise I’ll get clean when she comes rolling back to me I met a magician who said pills are poison and won’t help the state that I’m in but medicine is magical or so it’s been sung so somebody tell that to him and you can’t take the word of someone who just lives of protein-shakes and skag long blacks and thin whites and feeling nostalgic for something that you’ve never had but it won’t be me when she comes rolling back to me she spent so long telling me how she’s so broken but I knew that at just a glance it was only a dream but she knows when she’s been outsmarted in a game of chance now all I can do is just hold her to me now I’m soaked to the skin with her tears just say something polite, or incredibly trite like “a penny for your fears” it comes with the territory when she comes rolling back to me her voice rises and falls with the passing of cars at the break of the mist of the dawning and her cigarette’s lit and she’s feeling like shit it’s just bastard o’clock in the morning and the plovers cry out and the sparks all fade out and she drips her molten words on me it’s the hand of authority, the foot of eternity and the whole world just crumbles around me and it’s a rising sea when she comes rolling back to me so you go for a few pints to drown all your sorrows but it costs you an arm and a leg because you’ve just been away for a year and a day and they’ve doubled in price since you left see the nips are getting bigger but the pints are getting smaller and always the increasing price sipping gin through a straw but you know it costs more and guess what mate, you just got fooled twice but the drinks are on me when she comes rolling back to me at the pub ‘til late and your wallet’s lost weight and you’ve probably spent all that you’ve got now the power point’s drunk and the jukebox is stoned and you really didn’t need that last shot then it’s chucking out time and you stumble home stinking o f spew, cigarettes and cider and beer and butt-rollies and your BO’s unholy but you still get to lay down beside her that’s just her and me when she comes rolling back to me that’s just how we’ll be when she comes rolling back to me

the clouds spit in my face, the mountains turn away from me the cars on the highway dare me to jump I’m tied to the mast and I let in the rain there’s a southerly breeze but my flagship’s been sunk so I push through the crowd of shirtless sunburnt yobbos who give me this look as though I’m somehow to blame there’s a smooth patch on every welder’s bench so we can talk if you want but just don’t ask me my name it’s only Tuesday but I’m bleeding and I can’t seem to find anybody on my side it’s only Tuesday but I’m bleeding and seems once again I’ve been taken for a ride it’s only Tuesday but I’m bleeding I gave her my heart, she gave me a bottle and a reason to drink it and somewhere to fall and after taking the dive and crawling back up the goat track it turned out to be a good trade after all she would bounce off the walls, I would bounce off the gutter and we’d get so annoyed when we’d roll out of place now I just feel like some shrivelled up balloon that I would have preferred had just blown up in my face it’s only Tuesday but I’m bleeding I can’t turn back the clock so I turn over the page it’s only Tuesday but I’m bleeding I walk back across the moat to your minted rage it’s only Tuesday but I’m bleeding he sits in judgement of everyone that’s why they call him god he sips on his whiskey and spits out his soul says with the glass to his face “not everything can be replaced so the best you can do is try to fill the hole” so gentlemen, ladies, blood donors and babies let’s all link arms and jump overboard because the mainsail’s been torn, the captain’s drunker than I am and I don’t want the rats to beat us back to the shore it’s only Tuesday but I’m bleeding and I don’t want to attract all the horrors of the deeps it’s only Tuesday but I’m bleeding I can’t find my way home or my shoes or my keys it’s only Tuesday but I’m bleeding I stagger to your door in the middle of the night and I sneak in the back to make sure you’re alone I bleed on your floor and I hide in your garden I fall down your stairs and then drag myself home it’s only Tuesday but I’m bleeding is she spreading her lies or spreading her wings? it’s only Tuesday but I’m bleeding if I only had a compass I could learn all these things it’s only Tuesday but I’m bleeding

come down from your pedestal come down from your cross come out from the covers and look at everything you’ve lost you’re not as young as you think you’re not as old as you look and I wrote everything you forgot in the blank pages of this book now the scavengers read line for line and so only call me when you’re drunk ‘cause I can’t stand you when you’re sober shelter me from your storm and I’ll come round when it’s over and make way for the arseholes make way for the arseholes stand aside stand aside your body’s grown so much there’s not enough of you to fill it top it up with all that cheap white wine but there are quicker ways to kill it one more bobby pin in the shot glass one more day that just went wrong and a pocket full of gumnuts to remind you that she’s gone now cast ye your pearls before swine and so only call me when you’re drunk ‘cause I can’t stand you when you’re sober shelter me from your storm and I’ll come round when it’s over and make way for the arseholes make way for the arseholes stand aside stand aside and I never thought it would come to this never thought that much of you but sometimes the train wreck itself is all you’ve got left to hold on to and so only call me when you’re drunk ‘cause I can’t stand you when you’re sober shelter me from your storm and I’ll come round when it’s over and we’ll make way for the arseholes make way for the arseholes stand aside stand aside

I was spiralling downwards, bewildered and perplexed my clothes full of holes, underfed and oversexed I met her in the refuge, full of wonder full of wine she was deaf in one ear but I was blind in both eyes there was thunder, there were tidal waves but it wouldn’t be forever so we’d go dancing at the shoreline and enjoy the storm together I saw the traffic in her buttons and the diamonds in her glass and I would drink all of her poison and kiss all of her scars it was like she was made of incense, he hair was like the smoke and lips were like the flame and I breathed in until I choked she tied a knot in my hair and said “that’s so you don’t forget me” but no matter how I tried there was not a chance she’d let me and as we kissed, she slipped a chain around my wrist that I didn’t see and so that was Christmas and another wasted year put behind me all of the shine that comes with the summertime now it’s nothing but a dead pine tree now she keeps talking about the future, but I never thought about it I should tell her how I feel, but I just don’t know how to go about it it seems so serious, but don’t know where this is going is it a field in need of harvest or a seed in need of sowing? she got on my back about my drinking, said I that should give it up so I stole her last few dollars and I snuck off to the pub see we built this castle, and at the time we were pleased with it now it sits and gathers dust with the still-life army who besieged it I see the anger in her eyes, full of hubris full of lies trying to hold back the tide and keep herself afloat she closes every door but sticks out along the floor the handle from my broken oar to comprehend her boat it’s this margin call, it doesn’t make no sense at all to me and so that was Christmas and another wasted year put behind me all of the shine that comes with the summertime now it’s nothing but a dead pine tree now in this cupboard full of silence, this tragic chance that we’d been given when the gloss just fell away I looked into her shattered vision and there was the man she’d thought I was, through all my inadvertent lies with magic in his fingers and madness in his eyes it seemed like a miracle but it turned out to be nothing and now god is in the microwave and Jesus in the oven I said “you always speak without thinking, why not think without speaking” she said “I do all the time with all the secrets I’ve been keeping” but this town’s too small to hold a grudge, you can’t let resentment own you it’s like walking in the rain and hoping that prick gets pneumonia it all happens for a reason, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger why not take the higher road? because it’s steep and it takes longer so you take the high road. and I’ll take the low and I’ll be vindictive towards ye well I can screw a turn, I can nail a hammer, I can throw the water with the baby and the works into the spanner every pore of your skin, every vein in your eye, I just hold you by your stump and listen to you cry And now I can see, the way the weeds become trees overnight and so that was Christmas and another wasted year put behind me all of the shine that comes with the summertime now it’s nothing but a dead pine tree now it’s nothing but a dead pine tree and now I’m gonna go and burn that pine tree it was a Christmas tree when first I cut it down but everything is dead again when August rolls around I don’t really know what just happened, but I know it’s time to leave and I heard her say over my shoulder “please don’t sing about me” she said “don’t sing about me”

She knows we’re all the same so she plays every game out of fear of being left on the shelf Now she’s just standing in an empty theatre throwing flowers to herself she doesn’t realise when it’s hopeless, it’s just part of the process so she doesn’t even notice when she’s coming undone she always was where you were, goes with what you prefer so all your memories of her just blur into one into one she’s a defender for the weak, a voice for the meek, more meritorious than anyone else Now she’s just standing in an empty theatre throwing flowers to herself but you don’t really offend her, she ain’t got no real agenda she’s just tryna pretend to be better than you its a carefully arranged contrivance of rage as though things are gonna change but they never do never do now we’re awash in the ocean of shameless self promotion, say anything as long as it sells Now we’re just standing in an empty theatre throwing flowers to ourselves because a friend in pain is a friend in gain, it’s exceptionally plain when it gets this far but when our bagpipes skirl and our flags unfurl we think we have to fight the world but no one knows who we are who we are I could talk all night about what’s wrong and what right and the poisons of prominent wealth and now I’m standing in an empty theatre throwing flowers to myself and I’m keepin’ it cerebral, ‘cause the cool kids aren’t nice people, so I don’t even need to try to fit in I can see it I can taste it I can dance when I’m wasted, I can talk about places I’ve never been never been she’s the queen the queen of the green screen

I’ve lost my way now I’m stumbling through the rain along that riverside track thinking ‘bout all the things I should have done and thinking ‘bout all the things that I can’t have back I was born in the year of the scapegoat I grew up between a forest and a sea and the waves and the trees they kept all my dreams and all I wanted to have and all I wanted to be I can’t do what I’m supposed to be doing I don’t know what I’m supposed to know everything I’ve accomplished seems to intangible does it still count if I’ve got nothing to show? so tell me again how you’ll be there how all I need to do is give you a call ‘cause a promise that’s made in the light of the day at four in the morning means nothing at all so what do you do in the middle of the night? where do you go when everything is closed and who do you turn to when no one is about and it starts to look like there’s only one way out do you see sadness or the depth of a person? the golden locks or the hair in the drain? is the mask worth wearing to keep people caring? would I still be interesting if it weren’t for the pain? And what if I did things differently do you really think it’d be that strange? Just grab the bull by the horns and sweep up the mess what if I could, what if I did, what if I wanted to change? but misery is character-building anxiety is the spice of life so pick a job, pick a future, pick a house, pick a car pick your medication, pick your husband or wife ‘cause asking questions is like falling off logs but getting answers is like pulling a tooth and if you don’t want to lie then don’t ever talk just say you’re fine ’cause it’s easier than telling the truth so what do you do in the middle of the night? where do you go when everything is closed and who do you turn to when no one is about and it starts to look like there’s only one way out poisonous or physically harmful there are ways to make yourself feel good you can stop anytime if you started again I know you can but it doesn’t always mean that you should and then sometimes it feels like you’re better but you’ve just been played for a fool so how could you ever trust anybody else when your own brain can be so cruel when you’re surrounded by all your own failings and the times you didn’t but may you as well have what’s one small step for anybody else is one giant leap when you’ve got it this bad so ask me again what the deal is and let’s see how deep a hole I can dig I can’t just talk my way through it or talk my way round it nor over, nor under it’s so impossibly big so what do you do in the middle of the night? where do you go when everything is closed and who do you turn to when no one is about and it starts to look like there’s only one way out and where do you go in the middle of the night? what do you do when everything is closed don’t throw it to me, I’ll only drop the ball I got no advice for anyone at all and what do you do in the middle of the night? where do you go when everything is closed and who do you turn to when no one is about and it starts to look like there’s only one way out balloons and cicadas and beetles Everyone so full of goodness and cheer I choke on the brambles while the ants clean up the candles that’s when you realise there’s nothing left for you here

The serpent writhed before the feathered god with the maggots and the acrobats all face down in the sod I travelled south and east to find some things that used to be when I got there just as far as the eye could see was just miles and miles of chimneys alone and blackened fields and forests and what’s left of rock and stone there’s still a temple in this place, there’s still a shrine at its surbase but all the gods of good and right have left without a trace there’s something slippery in the walls, there’s something hidden in the drawers I took one final look and I said take me away I met a little girl with an old wooden box with the varnish all tarnished and rust upon the locks I asked her what was in it, she looked at me and sighed “are you asking out of interest or asking our of pride? “see my father put me under house arrest and went to feed the bin-born babies nestled in their cardboard nests so you ask what’s in the case, and I tell you to your face it’s all my hopes and dreams and things I wish I could erase” and he slides in the walls while she cries in the halls she falls to her knees and says take me away now my peg-leg has splintered and my false teeth have rotted in my garden of wattles and broken plastic bottles I wallow in my glory, in my filth, my ugliness ‘neath the pale winter sun in all her specious loveliness now you stay up in your tower and hope that you’ll survive now that I’m the roadkill on your lovely country drive it’s the drip of the still, it’s the needles and pills now all your misery is grist to the mill now the pipes shake the walls while she cries in the halls she tears at her hair and says take me away the blind man and the lady, the internecine affair while they focused on themselves they led us to the serpents lair now the reptile king the smuggest grin, we’re firmly in their grasp while the rest of us struggle on and those above us laugh and they tried so hard to seem politically correct so they went and outlawed music because that excludes the deaf and I railed ‘til I wept, I scratched ‘til I bled and I retched ‘til I spewed and I spewed ‘til I retched. “oh well” she says “we just have to suffer it now but most things hurt when I’m around in another three years maybe we’ll try again then again it might all be over by then” and they make you pay bills for the water they bleach and they charge you for dreaming and tax you for sleep and all revenue goes to the Mechanical Priest, he’s got the king in his pocket and he owns the police and he slides through the walls while she cries in the halls she claws at her skin and says take me away